Monday, January 21, 2008

PORTAL SPOILER


Don't want anyone who wants to play Portal to see this and be upset 'cuz I ruined the ending. This is a hilarious game. I didn't play. The boyfriend played. But you should play. These are just two of the quotes.

"Didn't we have some fun though? Remember when the platform was sliding into the fire pit and I said 'Goodbye' and you were like 'NO WAY!' and then I was all 'We pretended we were going to murder you'? That was great!"

"There was even going to be a party for you. A big party that all your friends were invited to. I invited your best friend the companion cube. Of course, he couldn't come because you murdered him. All your other friends couldn't come either because you don't have any other friends because of how unlikable you are. It says so here in your personnel file: Unlikable. Liked by no one. A bitter, unlikable loner whose passing shall not be mourned. SHALL. NOT. BE. MOURNED. That's exactly what it says. Very formal. Very official. It also says you're adopted, so that's funny too."


I'm Still Alive lyrics

This was a triumph
I’m making a note here
HUGE SUCCESS!
It’s hard to overstate
my satisfaction
Aperature science
We do what we must
because we can
for the good of all of us
except the ones who are dead

But theres no sense crying
Over every mistake
You just keep on trying
Till you run out of cake
And the science gets done
And you make a neat gun
For the people who are
Still alive

I’m not even angry
I’m being so sincere right now
Even though you broke my heart
And killed me
And tore me to pieces
And threw every piece into a fire
As they burned it hurt because
I was so happy for you!
Now these points of data
Make a beautiful line
And we’re out of beta
We’re releasing on time
So I’m glad I got burned
Think of all the things we learned
For the people who are
Still alive

Go ahead and leave me
I think I prefer to stay inside
Maybe you’ll find someone else
To help you
Maybe Black Mesa
That was a joke, ha ha, fat chance
Anyway, this cake is great
It’s so delicious and moist
Look at me still talking
when there’s science to do
When I look out there
It makes me glad I’m not you
I’ve experiments to run
There is research to be done
On the people who are
still alive

And believe me I am
still alive
I’m doing science and I’m
still alive
I feel fantastic and I’m
still alive
While you’re dying I’ll be
still alive
And when you’re dead I will be
still alive
Still alive
Still alive

1 comment:

Tiffany Anne said...

ha-ha. those quotes are funny. :)